+ THE 7 MAGAZINE . COM +

Choose Protection

2008-11-03T11:13:00.002-05:00

Last week I moderated "The Future of Black Gay New York City". It was an amazing event. I was very moved and thrilled to see so man attractive and upwardly mobile men of color coming together to discuss what is going on in our community. Someone walked up to me an said, "Congratulations on your initiation to becoming a community leader!" I just grinned but then it dawned on me later as I walked to the PATH station from The Center that I have a responsibility. WE ALL DO. Our responsibility is to embrace our leadership and make some changes in this world. We have the power.

One of the comments made was that the infection rate of HIV is still rapidly increasing in our community. One of the panelist seemed to believe that young people aren't listening. After brainstorming, I talked to some friends at NGenius Empire GRPHCS Department and they came up with this interesting concept. Over the next 6 months, there will be a National Campaign called CHOOSE PROTECTION. The goal is to reach young adults with imagery and music. Be sure to watch for our sponsors AND I will be making a BIG announcement in 2009 about the campaign.

Now I need your help. If you believe in this message and have a blog, myspace page, or youtube channel, we would like for you to embed this video to help us spread the word. Thank you and remember, CHOOSE PROTECTION, NOT INFECTION.

Choose Protection

2008-11-03T11:13:00.001-05:00

Choose Protection

2008-11-03T11:13:00.000-05:00

Seasonal Relationships

2008-10-27T11:15:00.000-04:00

The days are getting shorter and the nights longer. The leaves are falling off of the trees and a slight chill fills the air.

New York City is a very interesting place to be when the seasons change. In my experience, whenever, the seasons change, so do my relationships. I was beginning to see it as a pattern of mine but it seems to happen a bit more organically than that. As much as change frustrates me, I welcome it because it's always interesting to see what's on the other side. I am actually embracing and taking on going out to mix and mingle with NEW people. Sometimes we get caught up in the same routine and hang out with the same people and we miss out on new and exciting things. I am open to exploring new cultures and seeing what other people do for enjoyment and pleasure.

Remember, just because you make NEW friends doesn't mean that you don't love the old ones. You are just changing seasons! Go out and make a new friend today!

Changing

2008-10-17T08:23:00.001-04:00

Life is a funny thing. It will always be a funny thing. I am laughing this morning because I feel my life changing. Changing in a good way. I am definitely learning more discipline. I am feeling more empowered as well. Being a life coach and having one of my own has made such a significant impact on my life.

I am starting a 28-day program on Monday, which is designed to kick my butt. I have to start a routine, something that will put me into action and have me not be lazy around generating business for myself. I'm told that I won't recognize myself should I take on doing this 28-day program with velocity. Wish me luck!

To Change the World

2008-10-16T08:54:00.002-04:00

I am on a mission TO CHANGE THE WORLD! I recently watched a movie called "Pay it Forward" and I was so inspired that I decided to take matters into my own hands and create a movement of my own. The movement is called The ToUch THR3E Mission. I explain everything in the video above. My goal is to have this video viewed by ONE MILLION people. Now, imagine if everyone who watches the video actually takes on touching the lives of THREE people, that would totally cause a shift in the world. I am very excited and cannot wait to see the outcome. I do hope that people actually email me too! But, am I ready for all those emails? YEP!

Since becoming a Life Coach, my life has shifted in a major way. I'm getting things done with much more velocity. I am producing results that I never thought I could produce. I am also coaching people on how to live a life that they love. This is amazing! I highly encourage people to hire a life coach. With the way things are going in the world, it's important to have a structure, a support and that's what I provide for my clients. As always, I am more than happy to have conversations with people to share with them the benefits of having a personal life coach.

Email me at: NathanSeven.Scott@accomplishmentcoaching.com

October 29th - The Future of Black Gay NYC

2008-10-08T22:15:00.000-04:00

The Future of Black Gay New York City

2008-09-22T06:26:00.001-04:00

This is one panel you will not want to miss.
Please mark your calendars and BE THERE!

COMING THIS OCTOBER...

2008-09-03T17:22:00.000-04:00

CHECK OUT THIS PANEL THAT I WILL BE MODERATING THIS OCTOBER!

>>>> YOU101: Getting Results

2008-07-13T08:06:00.004-04:00

This THURSDAY, JULY 17th at GMHC I will be presenting YOU101, an interactive, goal-setting workshop that will provide you with ways to live out your dreams and live your best life. GMHC is located at 119 West 24th St., 2nd Floor, Room 230. Starts at 7PM. Please be on time.

Become a GBMNews Model

2008-06-29T11:01:00.003-04:00

Use this link: http://www.gbmnews.com/GBMLetters/Models.html

Coming soon... Vantage Point Season 3

2008-06-24T09:04:00.000-04:00

Check me out on ADTV!

2008-06-24T06:56:00.000-04:00

MAFM Pride Commercial

2008-06-18T12:34:00.000-04:00

MAFM PRIDE PARTY

2008-06-03T09:28:00.001-04:00

JANET JACKSON's Splash @ OCEAN

2008-02-20T15:04:00.000-05:00

NEED WE SAY MORE?
BE THERE!

Cheri Dennis comes to SPLASH!

2008-02-08T09:31:00.000-05:00

DENZEL MANIA

2008-01-07T07:00:00.000-05:00

DENZEL MANIA

2008-01-06T17:43:00.000-05:00

The HOPE Tour - South Africa

2008-01-05T13:48:00.000-05:00

adam: SERIES FINALE

2008-01-03T09:00:00.000-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2008-01-01T20:51:00.000-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2007 was a phenomenal year. Now it's time to embark on a new year with new beginnings and new goals. I have alot on my plate this year, so much that I don't even know where to begin. I have to first apologize for not bringing you a HOT January issue of The 7 Magazine, but the magazine is under construction. Since I've discovered a new medium, I've been focusing my time on creating and producing shows for my online channel, THE AND SHOW CHANNEL. The channel is the HOTTEST thing on youtube right now. If you haven't been to the channel, now is your chance. www.youtube.com/theANDshow .

Expect great things from me this year but since I'm only one man I have to pace myself. In the meantime, feel free to catch up on all of the shows on The AND Show Channel.

Make it a GREAT YEAR! I'm declaring this year... THE YEAR OF THE NATHAN!

Thank you for all of your support!

Nathan Seven Scott

End of the Year BASH!

2007-12-25T12:27:00.000-05:00

adam. - the mini-series - EPISODE VI

2007-12-19T23:30:00.000-05:00

DENZEL MANIA coming soon!

2007-12-15T19:32:00.000-05:00

adam. - the mini-series - EPISODE V

2007-12-12T22:19:00.000-05:00

adam. - the mini-series. - EPISODE IV

2007-12-06T08:50:00.000-05:00

WIN $100 CASH!

2007-12-04T14:20:00.000-05:00

www.youtube.com/theANDshow

THE DIGITAL ISSUE

2007-12-01T11:11:00.000-05:00

DIKHOTOMOS: The Evolution

2007-12-01T00:08:00.000-05:00

FLAWLESS - December - DENZEL.

2007-12-01T00:07:00.000-05:00

1. Tell me your favorite childhood memory. Waking up on Saturday mornings to a HUGE breakfast my grandmother fixed and the Saturday morning cartoons...I used to LOVE The Bugs Bunny and Tweety Show and X-men that used to come on Fox 5.

2. What makes you smile or laugh? Of course certain movies - I'm a big kid and still watch cartoons sometimes; they make me laugh. Seeing what some people actually wear outside sometimes cracks me up! MONEY makes me smile, and a lot of times certain songs make me smile also.

3. What do you think are 3 hot gadgets out right now? Tell me about them and why you think they are hot. Oh that's easy, because YES, I LOVE gadgets! The Ipod touch is hot! I just wish it came with more than 16GB of memory! The Nokia N series Internet Tablets and the Olympus FE 300 Digital Camera (12 megapixels)...all HOT and just gets me HOT thinkin about them! LOL.

4. If you had 3 wishes what would they be? lemme think about this for a minute.
1) A world with less drama, and violence, and more peace & happiness
2) A day (of even a couple days with all my favorite music artist! Mary J. Blige first and foremost! - Amerie, Jill Scott, & Trey Songz to name some others! and 3) I would probably wish for more money - I have a bunch of family and close friends to take care of...

5. When was the last time you cried? what did you cry about? The last time I cried during a break up....I was just really sad, upset, hurt, and angry..I rarely cry about anything, but that was a very emotional time for me.

6. How would you like to close out 2007? I like to close out ANYTHING with a BANG!
Ideally, just being around close friends (that have been around and active in my life - and put up with me for yet ANOTHER year!) and just partyin like rockstars with visions and goals of what i'm going to accomplish and move on to for the next year!

7. Do you think Barack Obama will win the Presidential Election? Honestly, I'm not really too big on politics like that...at least for now. But what I WILL say is that I think a white woman, would win the election before a black man. So NO, he probably won't win.

The N:X presents Pride in the City

2007-12-01T00:04:00.001-05:00

adam. - the mini-series. - EPISODE III

2007-12-01T00:02:00.002-05:00

Come Away with Me

2007-12-01T00:02:00.001-05:00

Come away with me…

Those were the only words that Sean Thurston allowed to linger in his mind.

Come away with me… in the night.

The lyrics to his favorite Norah Jones song were the only relief to the numbing nervousness that began to blanket over him.

As he replayed the lyrics over and over in his mind, he could feel the warmth of relaxation begin to flow from the crown of his head down towards his torso. He inhaled the cold, sterile air of the doctor’s office, which seemed to awake him from his intended relaxation nap.

Come away with me and I will rock you soft…

He closed his eyes tight and thought to himself, Oh, Norah; I wish I could go away with you or anyone else for that matter. I just don’t wanna be here.

Before he knew it, he was gently rocking himself from side to side in the hard wooden chair on his imaginary journey with Norah.

“All right, Mr. Thurston”.

Sean was startled back to reality by the sturdy, English accented voice of the doctor.

“Dr. Wright…”

Dr. Wright was a tall, lanky man with a white, pasty complexion. He walked into the office and sat down behind the cherry wood-grained desk, which was neatly adorned with family pictures and personal trinkets. His glasses sat at the tip of his nose as he looked over the contents of a dark blue folder.

Sean sat up straight in the chair and began to stare at Dr. Wright as if he was studying what was going on behind the doctor’s eyes.

He began to remember how he’d gotten himself into this situation. Two weeks ago, his best girlfriend, Dionne, had asked him had he ever been tested. When he told her that he had never gone through with the testing, she suggested that they go and be tested together.

Dionne had been sweating bullets because she hadn’t used a condom with her latest conquest. She said that after it was all said and done, he looked a little “suspect”. She used that term when she wasn’t 100% sure of what team her men were on. Needless to say, two weeks later, here Sean was… sitting across the desk from a man, who could possibly give him news that could change his life forever.

After further reviewing the contents of the folder, Dr. Wright sat down the folder and intertwined his fingers together.

Sean stiffened his demeanor while tension pulsed through his body.

That familiar blanket of nervousness was back with a vengeance.

Oh God, Sean thought to himself.

Dr. Wright looked at him and smiled.

Well, at least he’s smiling… That could mean that I’m clean, Sean thought.

“Well, Mr. Thurston, I know that you’re anxious to get these test results. I can only imagine how these past two weeks have been for you…”

Beads of perspiration were flooding down the small of his back as he awaited for the results with bated breath.

Our Father… who art in Heaven… Hallowed be thy name…, Sean inwardly prayed.

“Unfortunately, Mr. Thurston, you have tested positive for HIV”.

Thy kingdom come…thy will be done…

Sean looked straight ahead, as if he was looking through Dr. Wright.

He didn’t feel anything…

No anger…

No sorrow…

No sadness…

No shock...

He realized he was drained of emotion. The only thoughts in his mind were the letters H-I-V.

HIV…

Positive…

Suddenly, Sean could feel the gravity of the statement that Dr. Wright had just uttered. The warm sensation of shock began to permeate from the core of his being, as if a fire had been started in his stomach. The blurriness of Dr. Wright’s diagnosis began to come into focus.

“Mr. Thurston?” Dr. Wright hesitantly asked.

No answer.

“Mr. Thurston, are you all right?”

Sean just stared through the doctor, as a single tear ran down the left side of his cheek.

Come away with me… in the night…

DIRTY LAUNDRY - Coming Soon!

2007-11-20T14:55:00.000-05:00

The N:X with Erica Lewis

2007-11-19T11:00:00.000-05:00

MANIFEST - THANKSGIVING WEEKEND

2007-11-14T22:45:00.000-05:00

adam. - the mini-series. - EPISODE I

2007-11-14T22:36:00.000-05:00

UNEQ Magazine Exclusive with Terry McMillan

2007-11-14T13:05:00.000-05:00

The & Show: Sexual Assault

2007-11-05T09:23:00.000-05:00

The EVOLUTION ISSUE

2007-11-01T00:11:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the Evolution Issue! Each month I strive to bring the hottest images and now videos to the internet. I would like to thank EVERYONE who has followed my website since it's inception. I would like to thank YOU for reading it now and forwarding it on to your friends and family.

Why the Evolution Issue? Well, each day we all evolve. Some evolve faster than others, but we all evolve every day. I challenge everyone to become their own evolution, create the changes that you wish to see in your life. Build greater relationships, create and accomplish new goals, complete unfinished projects.... EVOLVE.

As many of you know, I spent a month in Cape Town, South Africa where my life changed forever! I was volunteering at a high school where I was told that the students came from extreme poverty and sordid lives. Going into the situation, I must admit I was nervous because there I was in another country, where I didn't speak the native tongue, I was surrounded by 1300 high school students, and exactly how sordid were their lives? I embraced my fear and met as many of the students that I could. The experience was much better than I anticipated. The students loved me. In fact, they treated me like a celebrity. They wanted to know about New York and American culture. They were eager to talk in front of the camera (more on that later). I fell in love with South Africa.

In my free time, I was able to explore Cape Town and the townships. The townships would be the equivalent to our "hoods". You had to see these places, the people lived in shacks, nothing like I'd ever seen here in the states, at least not where I'm from. One thing that I became aware of was their sense of community and brotherhood. They don't have sexuality issues there, the people speak to each other and everywhere you looked, there were BLACK PEOPLE. Smile.

The scenery was breathtaking. I made my way to the top of Table Mountain which overlooked Robben's Island, where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned. I saw exotic plants and flowers that we purchase at the florist. These people see these flowers along the side of the road the way we see dandelions and other weeds. I saw wildlife roaming about as we drove along the highways and byways.

Ultimately, the highlight of my entire South African experience were the friends that I made with some of the locals and most importantly the 16 students that I taught leadership to. I will never forget how they changed my life. The Evolution continues...

South Africa Slideshow

2007-11-01T00:09:00.001-04:00

Here are a few photos from my trip to Cape Town, South Africa. Enjoy!

This is the letter that the students presented to Derron & I on the last day!

To Nathan & Derron:

Through all the times you were by our side in good & bad times. You taught us how to be a leader one day and you taught us how to be successful in life. You were the ones who brought JOY and HAPPINESS in our lives. You were the ones who brought sunlight in our school. So from our side we want to say THANK YOU for everything you have done for us and we appreciate what you have done for us and keep up the good job.

From All of us in the Studio 7-D Group. Goodbye and good luck for the future!!!

I swear it took everything in me to hold back the tears because I grew to love these kids! The Evolution continues...

I AM A LEADER CAMPAIGN

2007-11-01T00:09:00.000-04:00

While I was in South Africa, one of the projects that I created was the I AM A LEADER CAMPAIGN. The students at the high school were so respectful and eager to learn and try something new. They truly inspired me to want to do more. This is Wiseman Lunga Ndengezi. It took me some time to finally say this young man's name correctly but I got it. I hope you enjoy the campaign!

FLAWLESS - November 2007 - Adam Benjamin Irby

2007-11-01T00:07:00.000-04:00

1. When i think of the name ADAM, i think about it from a biblical sense, yet you are a far cry from the ADAM in the good book. Tell me about your religious background. Did you grow up in the church? As cliche as it sounds I'm not religious, I'm spiritual. I believe in God and Jesus and all that good stuff, and I pray. I'm just not into church... at all. I grew up in church though, Pentecostal, Apostolic, hand clappin', foot stompin', tongue talkin', sanctified, Holy Ghost filled, fire baptized 'chuuch!' My parents are ministers and still deep into it though. For that reason they don't read my blog. LOL. And actually, I'm more like the biblical Adam than you think. Like Adam, I'm always letting a date get me into a lot trouble! LOL.

2. If you could be a vegetable, what would you be and why? I'd be a cucumber for obvious reasons... actually I've been a cucumber, a few times. LOL.

3. If you could have your way with (3) famous people who would they be and why these 3? Yung Berg is hot, Mario is hot, and Christina Milian is the future mother of my children. We'd make pretty kids.

4. What is your definition of a whore vs. a slut? Is there a difference? Nope, they're the same thing to me, a whole lot of fun. LOL!

5. Who do you think has more fun tops or bottoms? Bottoms, because they get to have sex with me. LOL

6. If you could color your personality what color would it be? Green, because it's the color of our money, the color of new beginnings, and it's always been my favorite color.

7. How do you measure success? Success is measured in the amount of lives you touch. In all seriousness, what makes my blog, my mission, and therefore my life totally worthwhile is all the emails and comments I get from people that have really been helped or can relate to one of my experiences I've shared on the blog. I touch them, they in turn touch me, but unfortunately none of us are naked though.

Visit ADAM: www.adamsweblog.com

The SHADOW: Stuck

2007-11-01T00:03:00.000-04:00

Something crazy and very unsettling seems to be going around. Bouncing from head to head- not just all over New York City, but apparently throughout the world- it somehow found its way through my immediate circle of friends and acquaintances, and has now finally landed on me. As a result, I am not stagnant and stuck. Not necessarily between a rock and a hard place (although it feels that way at times), but creatively, motivationally, and ...stuck.

I'm not quite sure if it has come with the entering of a new, and of course, colder season, or if I myself have changed and am trying to find my footing. All I know is that these days, when I wake up in the morning, I want to go right back to sleep. Not because I'm too tired, hungover or sick, but because I'm unmotivated and unmoved by the monotonous, revolving 24 hours that is my day and, in the grand scheme of things, my life.

I'm usually one to look on the brighter side of things or just keep my head down and push through with a smile on my face, but I gotta speak up- something is definitely wrong. I've hit a point where nothing in my life inspires me right now. Not the job I'm working, the projects I've involved myself in, the people in my circle, or even the book that I'm writing. Nothing. I won't go as far as to say, "I have nothing to live for-" that's stupid; but the question around what I'm living my life for is entering my head a lot more often than it used to. Probably because of all the time I spend thinking about such things while procrastinating on the "to do lists" of my uninspired (to me, at least) life.

At first, I thought it was just me- that I was in a funk of my own. Many of the people around me seemed to be extremely happy and productive, and so I resorted to the idea that my slump was strictly that... mine. It wasn't until I started sharing what I was going through with my friends that I began to see that damn near everyone is going through the same thing right now. Everyone is uninspired by the projects and events of their current lives. What happened? Is it that we are growing, and the things that made us happy no longer fulfill us anymore? Or perhaps we've grown lazy and impatient waiting for the lives of our dreams to present itself through the work we do on a daily basis?

No one seems to have an answer for this stagnant state of being that I, along with some of my friends and acquaintances find ourselves in these days. You might even be going through something like this as well. If you are, then I'm pretty sure you are also equally as frustrated. Some people have suggested finding peace at church or in yoga/meditation, while others have suggested things like taking a vacation or starting completely new projects. I don't know if these are the answers that I'm looking for, but I do know that it is only a matter of time before I, and you figure it all out. One of the things that has helped me begin to shift everything around is taking the opportunity to think of my life and various projects at a different angle. Also, allowing and inviting new things and people into my life that are forcing me to think and respond differently is starting to spark something in me that wasn't there before.

Maybe the key is to try something new and go out and do something different. Or maybe there's something to be said for appreciating what we've already created and remind ourselves of how those things inspired us in the first place. I don't know. But for those of you who *have* figured it out- please share it with the rest of us. Cuz I want to be excited about life again...

Larry Levine's HIGH.SEX.DRIVE

2007-11-01T00:01:00.000-04:00

FINALLY! I was recently approached to produce a video. It came out of nowhere. I received an email from this guy named Larry Levine about doing a few videos of a few guys. I was somewhat intrigued with one particular guy named Deso, so I agreed to produce the following and present it on my site. I hope you enjoy it. He's actually really sexy. Let's see where it goes from here.

coming soon... adam: the mini-series

2007-11-01T00:00:00.000-04:00

---- Reminisce -----

2007-10-29T10:09:00.000-04:00

i woke up today with 100 things running through my mind. thinking about what i have to do today. thinking about the workload i've created for myself to churn out to the world. i have a very cutting edge project coming out soon. be on the look out for my NOVEMBER ISSUE. it is bound to cause a stir in the community. i'm going HARD CORE with this issue. THE EVOLUTION HAS BEEN TELEVISED!

as i sat staring out the window i began to reminisce. thinking about past loves, friendships and relationships. i am clear that people come and go in our lives but what if you don't want them to. what if you NEED certain people and you have no real way of expressing it? or what if you THINK you are showing love when in turn the other person isn't used to receiving it that way. for example, some people like cards, and candy, and flowers and some people like to be slapped around and cursed at. but how would know that if they don't tell you or you don't ask? just a few things to think about.

then i sat down to my computer and started going through old photos and came across this photo of me and jared taken last year i believe. i love me some jared. he looks so adorable in this photo. anyway, the photo inspired me to post and i NEVER really post mid-month, y'all know i publish the magazine at the beginning of the month and i may post a video here and there but that's all i really make time for. it's hard keeping a blog!!!

anyway, i will close here. special shout out to JARED SHULER! (www.hisdailyvariety.blogspot.com) thank you for being my INSPIRATION today!

The & Show: Trick or Treat

2007-10-29T09:12:00.001-04:00

The & Show: Trick or Treat

2007-10-29T09:12:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Gay Men Make the Best Liars

2007-10-22T10:38:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Why Did I Get Married?

2007-10-15T10:07:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Nkosi's Top 10 Worst Dates

2007-10-09T07:46:00.000-04:00

The Hope Tour Movie: Making the Grade

2007-09-29T12:52:00.000-04:00

PLEASE CLICK THE ABOVE POSTER

The & Show: Meet Dr. X

2007-09-24T05:37:00.000-04:00

Dirty Laundry

2007-09-13T09:40:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Religion

2007-09-03T23:23:00.000-04:00

The Power of 3

2007-09-01T00:13:00.000-04:00

The Trinity

2007-09-01T00:11:00.000-04:00

September is finally here! I've been counting down the days for this month to arrive. On September 7th I will be leaving for SOUTH AFRICA for 3 weeks. I plan on making this the most exciting 3 weeks of the year 2007!

Although my favorite number is 7, the number 3 has been showing up alot over the past few weeks. I have no idea why, but I'm just going to roll with it. This month we will be starting a NEW season of The & Show with 2 new hosts, Will McNair and Nkosi Brown. It was time to mix things up a bit and get new perspectives from new people so I'm sharing the spotlight. You won't see me on every episode as I am launching The Nathan Seven Scott Experience. I realized one day that I actually enjoy doing one on one interviews and bouncing around the city so I figured why not give it a shot and I've been having so much fun so be sure to check out www.youtube.com/nathansevenscott for my NEW show. I love the internet!

I decided to make this issue of The 7 Magazine a "double issue" since I will be away for all of September developing a new project. I am pretty sure I won't have time to focus on the October issue so be sure to check back for updates. I promise you will not be disappointed with what I have in store for you.

As always, thank you so much for supporting The 7 Magazine. Continue to share the magazine with your friends and family. If you are sitting around on a Friday night and want to listen to a little talk radio, you can check me out at www.alldigitalradio.com at 8PM EST.

The Hope Tour - Destination South Africa

2007-09-01T00:10:00.000-04:00

FLAWLESS - September 2007 - Nicholas Nelson

2007-09-01T00:09:00.000-04:00

1. When did you first take an interest in equestrian sports? I have had an interest in horses as far back as I can remember. I started riding at the age of 7.

2. What excites you most about horses? Wow! There are so many things... I would say I get the most overwhelmed when I see a horse and rider combination competing in a perfect state of harmony. That is truly what this sport is about. Seeing and creating a connection between horses and people is beautiful to me.

3. How much was the most expensive horse you've ever ridden? $60,000 - $70,000

4. What are the top 7 songs in your ipod right now? OH boy, when I see this question I think ... Do I tell the truth and reveal what a nerd I am ha ha…
Mahalia Jackson: In the Upper Room and Sweet Hour of Prayer.
Red Hot Chili Peppers: Californication
Reba MacEntire: Fancy Don't Let Me Down
Teddy Pendergrass: My Greatest Inspiration
Keyshia Cole, Missy and Lil’ Kim: Let It Go
(My i-pod sounds like it has turrets lol but I have a very eclectic taste in music, everything from country to gospel, rock and rap!)

5. Besides horseback riding, what other things bring you joy? When I see a photograph that makes me feel as if I have been to a place that I have never been, or makes me imagine what a that person’s lifestyle or story is. I get inspired about my modeling work. It’s about transporting the audience from wherever they are to an imagined place you created in your photograph. And it brings me joy to perfect my talent in doing so.

6. Who do you think is the strongest contender in the upcoming election and why? It is between Hillary and Obama. But I would like Hillary to win. Our country is at a point were we need MAJOR reconstruction in a multitude of areas and I feel Hillary has the experience and backing to bring about those changes.

7. What is your biggest fear in life right now? I don't fear very many things. But, loosing my mind would be it for me. Anything else can be replaced, repaired or adapted to but once you lose your mind you are gone forever.

Spiritually Speaking

2007-09-01T00:08:00.001-04:00

Spiritually Speaking...

In a number (no pun intended) of world spiritualities, three figures prominently. Often, three represents the ideal unity of body, mind, and spirit.

The oneness of God in ancient Hebrew thought ("Hear, O Israel: The Lord is our God, the Lord alone" Deuteronomy 6:4, New Revised Standard Version of Hebrew Bible) became the "three-ness" of God in some, NOT ALL, Christian theologies, and the doctrine of the trinity was born even though the word "trinity" never appears in Christian scripture. Some Christians reflecting back on the identities of Jesus and God, after Jesus' death, reasoned that God was revealing Godself as Creator of the cosmos, in spirit form, and in human form--that is, in Jesus. (Unitarian theologies have consistently rejected this notion, and there have been non-trinitarian Christians all along. One of the problems that Muhammad had with what he knew of Christianity was that it had, in his view, established three Gods with the doctrine of the trinity. When he founded what would become Islam six hundred years after Jesus' execution, he reaffirmed with the ancient Hebrews the oneness of God. To this day, the foundational Islamic confession of faith is: "There is no God but Allah, and Muhammad is God's messenger.")

In Christian scripture, there are some interesting uses of the number three. In that pre-scientific age, the life force was thought to dwell with the body for three days after there was the appearance of death. Thus, when Jesus claimed that he would restore life to his deceased friend, Lazarus, one of Lazarus' sisters, Martha, objected, “Lord, already there is a stench because he has been dead four days” (John 11:39 New Revised Standard Version of Christian Scripture). In other words, the "three day" grace period has passed; it's really too late now! Ironically enough, many of the followers of Jesus claimed that God raised Jesus from death on the "third day." (The life force was not yet gone!)

In the book of Revelation (NOT Revelations), all numbers (and all other parts for that matter) are symbols meant to convey a message for the severely persecuted Christians at the end of the first century. Every character, every color, every prop, every number in the great drama are symbols. The number three is the symbol for divinity. The number four is the symbol for earthly completeness. When three and four are added together, the number seven results, and that is perfection. Making sure that our four is added to three is still a wonderful equation, a powerful goal, for us all.

Evolution of a Man by Will McNair

2007-09-01T00:07:00.001-04:00

The Evolution of a Man...

There comes a point in every man's (and woman's) life when they realize what it is they want to do with themselves. Some of us reach this point at an early age; others much later. And although we are constantly evolving as people from the day we are born, it is my belief that once we determine what it is we want for ourselves and our lives, and then proceed to take the necessary actions to get and do those things, the real evolution begins to take place.

This year, I've started to take notice of a major change within my life. A great evolution. I've sat down and had real conversations with myself about what I want to do with my life, where I want to go, and what I want to achieve. In addition, I've been determined to not just sit and watch these dreams float in and around my head simply as thoughts, but have taken actions to make all of these things happen. In short, I've been playing the game of life on the court as opposed to simply watching from the stands. Yes, I was evolving as a person before all of this started, but now, that evolution is becoming so much more.

Our evolving as individuals, and as a people, is a natural process. It's going to happen-good or bad- whether you like it or not. Which direction you drive your evolution, however, is completely up to you. You can sit around waiting for things to happen to you, or you can grab life and your dreams by the balls and make things happen for yourself- creating and controlling your own evolution. I have no doubt that all of you have dreams, aspirations and goals that you would like to achieve. We all do. I'm also sure that all of you are out to do great things with your lives. What I'm not sure of is if you are out taking action to get those things for yourself, or wait until they just show up for you.

I don't know about you, but at the end of the day, I want to look at my life and see all that I have created- not all that I have simply let happen to me. There is a difference. I want to be a person of action, not reaction. I want my evolution and life to involve people and things that I have sought out and gained for myself. I believe that we truly grow as people, and are able to see what we are really made of when we set a goal for ourselves, declare it in a way that inspires us, and then take the necessary actions to make our goals a reality. I want to leave behind a legacy, not just a memory. To do this, I have to do several things: ponder what it is I want out of life, allow myself to want and deserve it, and then go get it.

What are you working on? How are you evolving? Is life dragging you or are you driving the car? These are questions we all need to ask ourselves every once in a while, if not on a regular basis. Life is all about having fun. God, or whatever higher power you believe in, did not put you here to coast along. He put you here because you are supposed to DO something! Something great that you may or may not have even realized yet (maybe you haven't even started looking), but are desperately seeking to find. Let me ask you this though- What will your legacy be, and when will you get to work to make it a reality? I don't know, but I'll tell you this... I'm well on my way. This is the game I'm playing with my life. This is what inspires me to take action. This is the Evolution of a Man!

-- Will McNair www.evolutionofaman.com

Am I the Solution? by Nkosi Brown

2007-09-01T00:06:00.000-04:00

Am I the Solution?
A Confession of the Threesome Guest Star

He was light, long, & lean, and it was magnificent. It was short lived though—our dating time that is. Before I knew it, he had a boyfriend and soon after they were apartment sharing. (*Eyes Roll)

So after his 4 month I-am-in-a-new-relationship disappearance—we became friends. I, more specifically, became his confidant to hear all the inappropriate disclosures of their relationship. (*Yawn)

Still, he was the thought that aroused me in my 1-on-1 sessions with myself. (Damn.)

He expressed that he was pent up and so he refused to see me. (What?)

After having been liberated from my own personal 5 month sexless relationship, I empathetically asked, “Why are you not having sex?” (With the nukka you dumped me for?)

Simply put—they weren’t compatible. (Huh?)

As much as I believe in love and romance, and even convenience for that matter—I personally need to get my rocks off—and so…..I was completely and utterly baffled by how they twain wanted to be one but wouldn’t compromise.

And further more, why did they get together in the first place if they knew they both had the same sexual likes. Maybe I’m a label whore, but when it comes to clothes and sex—they tend to keep things cute.

Anyway, it was a stand off and neither would indulge the other. So *insert the trumpeting calvary soundtrack* he called me in for my....expertise.

Now the question became, “Was his sex so good that I could accept the fact that he passed me up for Mr. Blue Balls?”

Yes, indeed it was, but Mr. Balls was not cute. So I declined.

Lesson: Make sure your partner is on point before you ask for a third.

This September join The & Show and the Power of Three!

Stanley Bennett Clay

2007-09-01T00:04:00.000-04:00

An interview with Stanley Bennett Clay
By Stephen Andrieux
Kuttinedgeonline.com

Recently kuttinedgeonline.com had the pleasure of meeting up with esteemed author Stanley Bennett Clay to discuss his brand new book “Looker.” We hope you enjoy this insightful look into the life of Stanley and his captivating new book. If you haven’t had the opportunity to purchase his new book check out the kuttinedgeonline.com shopping section and purchase your copy today!.

Stephen: So Stanley, I am so glad that we are able to finally speak. I have been such a strong fan of your work and I am eager to share learning more about the man behind the literature. Where is life like for Stanley after this latest release?

Stanley: I am very comfortable where I am right now. I have had successful careers as an actor writer and as a composer and it has been very rewarding.
The most important thing that I can say right now is that I have great friends and family and health. I have great health on top of everything.

I guess as I reflect on all of my accomplishment, I have to ask myself, how did I luck out to get all of these blessings and I think part of it is that I so humbly appreciate them.

Stephen: What were the challenges in getting to this point in your life?

The challenges, I don’t know if they were challenges. I always thought that my life was pretty boring because I did not have the challenges that other people had.
I had a wonderful mother and a wonderful father who passed away.
I grew up watching them with very little money create this world for themselves and their family and it was not until I became an adult that I was really aware about the turmoil that was happening in a lot of black families, I was kind of like sheltered in that respect.

So the challenges for me were trying to understand other people’s challenges. I think that I try to capture that in my writing. What I’ve done is that I recognize those conflicts and for lack of a better term act as a voyeur, watching what other people were going through and telling those stories.

It was very hard for me to write anything autobiographical because I find my autobiography kind of boring.

But I find what other people are doing very interesting with facing conflicts and things like that.

Stephen: I wouldn’t say that your life is boring; I mean you have written numerous books and plays, been publisher of two magazines and won 3 NAACP awards. That has got to be an exciting experience?

Stanley: Well you know what it is. What’s interesting about winning awards. I have been winning awards all of my life and I think because I write honestly and as an actor I try to act honestly. I try to do things in an honest way and without wanting to do it to get an award. But……. suddenly people want to give me an award for it. Wow! It is just another humbling experience for me. I am always amazed that people think that I was that good that I deserved to win an award. You know it’s just another blessing. I definitely have to say that there are more blessings than challenges.

But if I am to directly answer your question I would have to say the biggest challenges is to keep improving upon myself. As someone says I really your work or I really like this particular book or I like really like this particular play. The challenge becomes to do something better.

That’s the challenge.

Stephen: Where did you get the inspiration for your book?

I always wanted to write about my community in Los Angeles because we don’t see a lot of stories about the black middle class in Los Angeles. It is either South Central or gang banging or it’s the fake and the plastic.

I wanted to chronicle the other world. There is another world that no one ever talks about. It’s the largest black community in Los Angeles which is the Baldwin Hills, Leimert Park, View Park, Area Theses areas are very conservative in living conditions but the community is very liberal and politically active and very powerful. They are very comfortable in their lives but they are not about the bling, bling. They are not about talking about it. They are not very demonstrative. I wanted to tell the story of those people that live in and for all intensive purposes a paradise, because Los Angeles is a paradise.

I wanted to write about this as people don’t get that lifestyle if you were to go by a lot of the literature that’s out there today. So as a result, I said that I want to be this crazy LA writer that writes those stories . I wrote in search of “Pretty Young Black Men” and “Looker” is the continuation of that kind of story. I wanted to write about your average every day well adjusted black homosexual, which we don’t get to enough of. Every Black homosexual is not crazy or sexed up or all this kind of stuff that you see in some of the media portrayals.

Most black homosexuals that I find are in some kind of decent relationship. The one’s that are single maybe that younger one’s but in my generation I find more people in long term committed relationships that are going through what everybody else is going through in a regular relationship. So there is nothing strange about it.

Stephen: So tell my audience a little about “Looker”?
I wanted to tell the story about a guy who faces the challenge that his life is almost too perfect. In his quest throughout this book he searches for the passion that is some how lacking in his life and it takes outside forces to create and to ignite the passion.

It was always their but it was lying dormant.. So that is what the story is really about. How do you ignite passion and realize that the love your life was staring you in the face all the time. He winds up falling in love with his best friend.

Stephen: So what kind of response have you received from the book?

Stanley: An excellent response, the reviews have been really great. Grady Huff, a top ten reviewer on Amazon.com has given it a five star review and Raw Sister book review which is a network of black female writers has given it five stars and a rave review and Clik Magazine has a given it a rave review. So, I’m kind of like taken a back by that cause I know what I went through writing the book and the complexity of writing the book.
So I am proud that it has been well received.

Stephen: How long did it take you to write the book?

Stanley: It didn’t take me a long time, but what I tend to do is write 4 to 5 projects at once. Whichever one gets finished first is the one that goes out next. I don’t even remember when I started it but I said oh, I think that this is finished and turned it into the publisher.

The publisher’s liked it, and I must say that I have to give a lot of credit to my publishers.

Stephen: You’re with Simon & Schuster?

Stanley: Yes.

There is this young editor over there by the name of Rashawn Trotman, who just gave me some insight on the younger generation and taught me how to address certain issues that younger people, people much younger than myself are face with.

So there nothing like a good editor and this young lady really made the book better than it would have been without her input.

Stephen: What do you find to be the difference between the age groups?

Stanley: When I was coming up, there was really no age gaps because the different age groups because the different age groups hung out together.

Stephen: Do you feel that this still goes on?

Stanley: I would have to answer that based on my own personal experience. I tend to have younger friends I find people in my own age category, they tend to be a little cynical, they tend to complain a lot and it ultimately comes down to that when you reach a certain age they are sitting around waiting to die.
The one thing that I like about young people is the optimism. I get energized by that.

There is a great deal of wisdom among older people but also there is a great deal of cynicism.. So, I tend to find young people to hang out with. And as a result even in my relationships. I mean the guy that I have been involved with for the last four years is 24 years old. I find that I learn so much from him and his enthusiasm for life.

Because you see, I’m still young at heart kind of person and I want to be able to talk about the possibilities. the limitless possibilities of life. I really don’t want to have a conversation with someone who has already limited their life and put a cap on it.

Stephen: Well, I was very happy to see that you have come out with another book, because I think that literature is something that our community so needs. How you feel about what it is our younger generation is doing right now?

Stanley: It is a very complex thing for me. On one hand I am very disturbed by the DL situation, I am not as disturbed by the homophobia because I think that this generation is probably less homophobic because they actually understand it a lot better. It is no big deal to a lot of younger people. It’s a big deal to people in the public eye.

The same rappers who are sitting their talking about faggots and homosexuals are the same ones that are getting their ass’s fucked everyday. And the same ones that are out their with every man they can get their hands on.

But those young people who have a sense of self who are real heterosexuals who are real solid in their sexuality they don’t have a problem with it.
They realize that we live in the world that has so much prejudice and that how in the world can you say that someone is a racist and you yourself are homophobic.

Cause if the white man calls you a nigger, if a man calls a woman a bitch, a straight person calls a gay person a faggot, your all in the same hell hole.

What everybody has to understand is that the issues is cross generational. No generation has a lock on that. But I have a lot of hope for young people because I think that when this older generation dies out and a lot of their old fucked up ideas die out. The world will be a better place

You know the thing is that we all have equal sharing in society and I think that young people are beginning to understand it because young people now are getting to know other kinds of people. Thank God for the internet.

Stephen: What have you seen happening throughout the generations coming up?

I think that one of the things and this may contradict something that I said earlier. I do see that the down low thing as damaging because and I say it may contradict something I said earlier because I said that this generation is more enlightened in certain areas. The down low thing is preventing a movement.
I came out as a gay man a year before stonewall in 1968 and at that time when stonewall hit. It was a revolution and at the same time as the gay revolution it was women’s liberation, it was the civil rights movement.

So you had all of these people that white straight constipated America had a thing against. When all three of these events came about and at the same time, there was much more support for each other as a whole. The Black Panther’s were supporting the Gay movement, the women were supporting the gay movement, the gay movement was supporting the women’s movement. Everyone was supporting each other and everyone was marching and protesting.

And you could be I’m black and I’m proud, I’m gay and I’m proud, I AM WOMAN, and nobody could fuck with any of us. There was a solidarity, there was a freedom.

The young people took over America and said we have no problems with Gay people , there’s no problem with women, there’s no problem with black people.

Things began to change when Reagan began as president and 25 Years later aids hit.
Everyone went back into the closet and that was the worst thing that could happen in this country because our country was about to become a truly liberated world and America was about to really fulfill its promise of equality of all people because that is where it was going.

There was a good chance that 25 years ago that gay marriage would have been legalized already. I was married in a church in 1976 and it was no thing and people were getting married all over the place. So now I say damn what is all this controversy about.

On one hand you say that gay people are promiscuous because they are having all of this sex. Yet the government will not allow gays to get married so that they can have legalized committed relationships, so the conundrum is something that has been created by this society that you can’t get married so, therefore every time you have sex it is fornication because I’m not married. But you won’t let me be married.

Who’s the idiot? It is as stupid as George Bush not sending his two daughters to war.

Stephen: Do You have any hope for the political climate in the future?

Stanley: Yes, Absolutely, I happen to think that young people are going to elect Barack Obama. As much as I admire to a degree the sharpton’s, the Jesse Jackson’s and all of those people of almost and irrelevant generation, that the new generation has to take over.

Jesse and Al had their place and they had their time. It’s time to move on. Nothing against them but they are elder statesman and that is where they should. Right now I think that the hope of this country is Barack Obama. He will unify this country and not only will he unify this country he will unify the world. After the pittiest situation that is George W Bush where he has made us enemies all across the world, we need someone who can go internationally and show that America is still a compassionate country

In my opinion the only person that can do that is Barack Obama, Hillary can’t do it because of the hate factors, the old school factors, also the factor of the dynasty here and we are not a country of dynasties. Since 1992 this country has been ruled by a Bush or a Clinton. That is to close to royalty and it is time to get rid of that and get some fresh blood.

I think that the ticket is Obama, Edwards and I won’t even say they fact that they are just as cute as they want to be. LOL

You send those two out there to the world and we will retain our position in the world as the compassionate leaders of freedom…… again represented by these two men.

Even if it wasn’t Obama, I would have to go with Edwards and I love Hillary ….
and I thought before Edwards and Obama got into the Race it was Hillary….. Hillary diva #1.

But now my thought are that she looks really old and tired and traditional and old school compared to what needs to happen in 2008. We are barely into 2007 and she looks old and tired so by this time next year comes around she is going to look like hiccabah.

Stephen: So translate that into the black gay community. What do you feel needs to happen to evolve the black gay community?

Stanley: We have to start learning the lessons of some of our non- contributory older folks and we need to stop complaining about the spilt milk. Wipe up the fuckin’ milk! Solutions! It’s all about solutions.

We are a grand proud people. We are a grand proud culture. So why are we not emphasizing that.

MARS PARTY - Friday September 7

2007-09-01T00:01:00.000-04:00

Fairgrounds IV - September 14th

2007-08-31T22:38:00.000-04:00

The & Show: If I smoked weed...

2007-08-28T10:47:00.000-04:00

The Fashion Issue of UNeQ Magazine

2007-08-22T07:39:00.000-04:00

Get Ready for Volume 3 of UNeQ... coming THIS FALL!!!

Coming this September...

2007-08-20T09:31:00.000-04:00

Got2b(2) @ OCEAN

2007-08-19T12:04:00.000-04:00

introducing Nathan Seven Scott TV

2007-08-19T10:54:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Will McNair & Nkosi Brown

2007-08-14T00:23:00.000-04:00

POSITIVE Exclusive Parts 1 - 4

2007-08-10T10:49:00.000-04:00

OCEAN TUESDAYS

2007-08-10T10:19:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Black Women Revisited

2007-08-06T09:47:00.000-04:00

The Nathan Seven Scott Experience

2007-08-01T00:10:00.000-04:00

August is here and the summer is coming to a close. It's been a very interesting summer to say the least. So much has happened. July was wonderful and productive and I pray that August will bring forth more wonderful surprises.

As I begin to count down the days leading up to my trip to SOUTH AFRICA, the excitement builds. I still can't believe that I am actually going. It's one of life's dreams come true for me. I'm going with a few friends on what I am calling THE HOPE TOUR: 21 Days in South Africa to share an amazing experience and effect the lives of others. I cannot wait to tell you all about it because at that point I will be INTERNATIONAL.... LOL! I will make every effort to share my experience while I am there but you can best believe I will have a story or two upon my return.

This month I am choosing to let go. I am choosing to not let past hurts continue to haunt me. I am choosing not to be that bitter faggot that lurks around every corner. I am looking to new beginnings. I am looking to establish new relationships and build new experiences. This month I present to you The Nathan Seven Scott Experience. This particular project has been sitting on my desk for months and it hit me in July that I had just a bit more to say and this was the platform to do it. So, I am sharing my experiences with YOU!

Also this month, I am embarking on another media outlet and that is my own online radio show. I will be on www.alldigitalradio.com every THURSDAY at 8PM Est. So you have to check that out. I will be giving advice on life, relationships & sex mostly (if not my own sex life, somebody's LOL). Occasionally I will have a friend or 2 drop in to share the microphone with me. I'm looking forward to it so stay tuned...

The N:X presents POSITIVE Part 1

2007-08-01T00:09:00.000-04:00

The N:X presents FLAWLESS

2007-08-01T00:08:00.000-04:00

THE PARTIES Continue...

2007-08-01T00:07:00.000-04:00

Lee Hayes - The Messiah

2007-08-01T00:06:00.000-04:00

1. Can you give me a brief summary about your new book "The Messiah"? The Messiah is a crazy, off-da-fucking hook story and a very different kind of book for me. The premise is pretty simple: Imagine meeting the man of your dreams: he’s tall, dark, extremely handsome, successful and he is completely in love with you; in fact, he is everything you hoped you’d find in a lover.

Now, what happens if you begin to suspect that this man of your dreams is a notorious serial killer?

The novel is the story of Gabriel Kaine, a disgraced journalist who gained notoriety months ago covering a series of ritualistic killings by The Messiah. After the messiah disappeared months ago, Gabriel finds his career in a funk, much like the rest of his life, until his meets his dream man, Dr. Garrett Lord.

2. Why did you call it "The Messiah"? It is called The Messiah because the psycho killer in the story really thinks he is The Messiah. He preys only on gays and lesbians in a twisted attempt to save their souls right before he kills them in twisted and Biblically-inspired fashion.

3. Zane is a huge supporter of you obviously, she is presenting your work. How did you guys meet? Well, a few years back when I self-published my first novel, Passion Marks, I did a lot of Internet Marketing. Anytime I found a group who was reading anything about anything I would email information about Passion Marks, including an excerpt from the first chapter. If you’ve read the book, then you know it opens with a brutal beating and rape of the character Kevin Davis by his controlling lover, James Lancaster. Then one day, I posted the chapter on a list serve designed for black women readers/writers and I got an email from the person who thought the chapter was really good and wanted to know what I wanted to do with the knowledge. We emailed each other several times and I finally looked up the name on the profile and it said, “ZANE” and I emailed her back asking if she was the ZANE. Of course, it was her and she told me she had just formed a company with Simon & Schuster out of New York. I finally asked her if I could send her the whole book and if she could give me some feedback. I sent it to her and couple of weeks later she emailed me saying she “looooooooooved the book” and that I should call her. So, I did and the rest is literary history…LOL.

4. How has the success of your books changed your life? Well, I’m still pretty much the same person, only a few more people know who I am or have read my books. The coolest thing is getting emails from people or having conversations with people who have been “saved” by reading Passion Marks or decided not to cheat on their lover because they read A Deeper Blue: Passion Marks II, my second novel. Being in a position to inspire people to live their dreams and to take back control over their lives is a very, very cool thing.

I want you to ask me this same question in a year. I have big things planned. And, the books are just the beginning.

5. Do you plan on making movies out of any of your titles? Has anyone approached you thus far? HELL YES! I would love to see Passion Marks on the big screen. I mean, can you imagine how powerful and provocative the story would be when—not if—it comes to life the big screen. Passion Marks is gripping and seeing images of domestic abuse and violence between two black gay men would shock and awe.

I have a couple of things in the works, a couple of good contacts, folks reviewing The Messiah for a possible movie, as well as strong interest in Passion Marks. I’m actually writing the screenplay to Passion Marks right now and will be done by the end of August. So, although nothing is definite now, I know that it shall come to pass! I have spoken my dreams into existence…

6. Does music influence your writing? Wow….this question completely caught me off guard, but the answer to it is yes. If you notice, I make many, many musical references to songs and artists in my novels. I have mentioned everyone from Stephanie Mills, to Jill Scott, to India Arie to Jennifer Holliday and Jennifer Hudson. Music is a driving force and I use the songs that I am feeling at the time in some form in my books. Music is power, it is passion, it is a life beat and there is no way I could write if I wasn’t influenced my music.

7. What is your next project? Passion Marks – the movie!!!!! And, I have a hot, steamy, sexy anthology of erotic short stories coming out in March 2008. I selected some of the best gay writers to participate in the book and I can’t wait until it burns up the shelves. There will be a lot of touching and feeling going on!

FLAWLESS - August 2007 - Nkosi Brown

2007-08-01T00:05:00.000-04:00

Mmmmm…why do I like to make people laugh?

I guess I’ve never like tense situations and have often used humor to diffuse them. I especially hate arguments and in my ideal world people would converse for the sake of understanding—which has a very different energy than an argument and/or debate.

In general, I love the power of humor because I think it is the great equalizer. Like everyone can laugh at my material and I’m sure for very different reasons. As a comic, I have learned that neither my race nor sexual orientation limits me to a particular audience or market. I really want to stress how big this realization is for me.

Here’s a quick story: I was asked to perform in front of a late 20s--early 30’s straight urban crowd out in Brooklyn. I hesitated for a few weeks because I was really scared for every reason one could imagine. It turned out to be a tough room—but their response had nothing to do with my sexual orientation. There were those who were focused on their drinks and conversation, but I had a core audience who laughed with me, loved me, congratulated me, and encouraged me.

After the show this PHNYE Jamaican…who I had really hope was on the DL and trying to holla… said, “Listen, I’m gonna tell you as a yardie, if I think you are funny then you are funny.” Despite his arrogance and my disappointment and soaked underwear, I took his statement to mean: I’m supposed to be homophobic by my culture and you made me laugh. That’s the impact I am to have in this world—to move beyond the societal limits that are supposed to be in place in this world and comedy is my vehicle.

Spiritually Speaking ... Taking Vacation

2007-08-01T00:04:00.000-04:00

Many of us in the United States look forward to summer vacations whether our summers are, in fact, the best times to take them. As it turns out, other times of year could be better for us in a number of ways. For example, on one of the early-morning news shows the other day I heard an “expert” informing viewers that all the companies and individuals who make money when we buy gasoline enjoy the busiest travel month of all in the US, August, because demand for fuel is heaviest; thus, suppliers and sellers can “justify” raising prices throughout the eighth month (as if they have needed any special reasons or excuses of late!).

In any case, we do need vacations, and even though demands on employees in the US are very high, we are typically offered less vacation time than colleagues in other countries and cultures (notably in Europe). Judging from the heavy-duty marketing of travel to LGBT persons, it is possible that non-heterosexuals in the States may find ways to get their vacations despite time-stingy companies.

The ancient Hebrews who imagined how their God could have created the heavens (that is, literally, the skies) and the earth believed that for whatever reason after six days of work even God needed and took a day off. The Hebrew words (shabbat and shavat) from which we get our English “sabbath” meant something like: cease as in ceasing from labor (“ceasing” being a more accurate translation than “rest” or “resting”).

In the modern scientific world where many may scoff at the efforts of the ancients to explain something prescientifically, we can verify and quantify that prolonged periods of physically taxing and/or emotionally stressful work literally steal our health from us. The ancients were on to something after all. If even God needed a rest, certainly woman and man did. We need regular breaks. We need refreshment and relaxation. We need vacations. We need sabbaths!

Evolution of a Man...

2007-08-01T00:03:00.000-04:00

Somewhere Over the Rainbow…

It’s summer time, and once again, everyone seems to be frantically searching for locations far, far away at which they can let their hair down, forget about their troubles, and perhaps, get down with gay people from across the globe. This latter agenda item leaves us questioning our friends, researching online and more in the hopes that we will find a comfortable, entertaining and relaxing destination where we can be as gay as we wanna be.

I, myself have yet to extensively travel the globe- I’ve only been out of the country once a few years ago, and that was on a trip with family members. Right- not gay at all! It is definitely time, however to spread my little queer wings a little wider and go on holiday. But where does one travel when conquering the gay globe? After doing a little research of my own, I’ve compiled a list of what I’ll call the 5 Gay Meccas of the world. Hopefully they will help you in researching your next big gay vacation.

First, let’s start at home… NEW YORK CITY!

Now, I know many, if not most of you are thinking, “Bitch, I live in NYC. Why the hell would I want to vacation here?” If this is you, I ask you to consider the following. Consider the fact that there are probably many, many places that you have not yet visited, and many things that you have yet to see and do in the city in which you live- regardless of whether it’s NYC, ATL, Chicago, etc. Try opening your mind just a little bit more, and go on an adventure in your own city. Visit a part of the city (perhaps known to be gay) that you would normally not travel to or party in, and see what comes up. Who knows, you might find your new favorite coffee shop, club, boyfriend- whatever. You never know what’s out there…

Now, let’s get outta the country!

Mykonos:

First and foremost, Mykonos boast a wide variety of beaches both gay friendly and predominately gay. Now, it may be true that many black gay men aren’t going near any body of water for no swimmin’, but if there’s one hobby that gay men across the globe participate in, it’s staring at other hot gay men. What better place than to do that than on the beaches of some foreign land? The general rule of thumb around Mykonos beaches is that the more rocky the beach, the more likely you will find studs cruising it.

It is advised that you plan your stay in the port for more lively gay nightlife. However, if you wish to have a more relaxing trip, a location near Plati Yalou Beach would be more for you. There is a very gay friendly area called Little Venice- known for its outdoor café’s, bars and shops. And after all, that eating, drinking and shopping, you can catch the sunset at the Kastro Bar (also in Little-Venice) and then dance the night away amongst the local divas at Pierro’s gay disco.

Ibiza:

God, I love Spain! When I visited there (only for a few days), I found myself in need of many changes of underwear after a healthy day of cruising and sightseeing. Ibiza remains to this day, one of Europe’s premiere destinations for homos and their friends.

Don’t you dare visit Ibiza without hitting up Privilege- the world’s largest club. There’s also Es Paradis- noted for its water parties, and Amnesia- known for foam parties. (side note: if you’ve never been to a foam party before, you have not yet lived! That shit is bananas!). The point here is that although the beaches of Ibiza are fantastic, and definitely worth seeing; if you don’t hit up all the clubs and bars that Ibiza has to offer, then you are not only missing out on some serious dancing, but some serious chorizo as well.

Montreal:

Although Montreal does have a great gay social scene, I, being a peaceful-natured queer love the draw of the many Bed and Breakfast spots located in the village. These quaint little mini-hotels are located right in the heart of gay Montreal- many of them open for men only. What’s great about them is that at first glance, one may think of them as a simple hotel, they are so much more- they tend to be a bit more comfortable than many other hotels- and as opposed to staying in a hotel, one of the pluses of staying at a B&B is it’s feeling of home. You don’t ever really feel too far away from home staying at a B&B.

Also, while in Montreal, I would recommend venturing out into the country and going for a hike. Montreal has great hiking within the city limits, and much more backpacking in the surrounding regions. Not all vacation destinations have to end up with a trip to the beach and/or club. I love the outdoors, and quite often jump at the opportunity to strap on a backpack, and hike up a mountain to a nice lake/ campsite. While in Montreal, if hiking/ backpacking strikes your fancy, be sure to check out the mountain, Mont Royal. There you will find dozens of trails and pathways in the area. I know it sounds intimidating and just plain “not fun” for many of you, but try it out. What’s the point of living if you’re not going to try something new every once in a while.

Bangkok:

Finally, there’s this little piece of Thailand that boasts some of the wildest parties and most extreme gay culture. Bangkok is the heart of gay Thailand, although money can’t buy you love, it can buy you a close copy for a short time- if that’s what you’re into. The party scene in Bangkok ranges from bars, to clubs, to saunas, to karaoke and cabaret. If you can think it up, it probably exists somewhere in Bangkok. The “gayborhood” of Bangkok is located in the ever-so-trendy Silom/Suriwong/Patpong area. The nightlife is fierce, bordering insane, with most of the gay go-go bars featuring sexy shows in addition to go-go dancing. (y’all know I love me some strippers!).

If you haven’t already guessed, Bangkok gives a little more of a seedy representation than the other gay destinations on this list. I wanted to add it so as to show the vast differences in experiences that you encounter in your trek across the gay globe. In gay Bangkok, the feminine side of society is celebrated. In fact, upon visiting, you will learn of the famous “ladyboys” who walk the streets in search of their next party, function, etc. Most are she-males who cannot afford the full operation, but interestingly enough find themselves partners in both gay and straight men. Sure, it may be a vast difference from what you are used to, but you’re bound to learn a lot about the world once you visit.

*****

Of course there are many, many more destinations and adventures to be had across the globe- I just wanted to point out a few that I have been researching while looking to plan my next vacation. Regardless of where you are going- whether it’s near or far to your current location, as you travel over the rainbow, be sure to be careful, stay protected, and take a camera- you’re gonna want to catch it ALL on film! Have a great trip!

The N:X presents Stanley Bennett Clay Part 1

2007-08-01T00:02:00.000-04:00

The N:X presents POSITIVE Part 2

2007-08-01T00:01:00.000-04:00

The & Show: HIV

2007-07-30T10:55:00.000-04:00

Remembering Dekenric

2007-07-27T12:55:00.000-04:00

HIV POSITIVE - 08.01.07 -

2007-07-26T10:29:00.000-04:00

BE SURE TO TUNE IN NEXT WEDNESDAY FOR

The & Show: George K. Jordan

2007-07-16T10:46:00.001-04:00

PRIDE IN THE CITY WEEKEND!

2007-07-11T08:33:00.000-04:00

MEN ARE FROM MARS IS BACK!!!

The & Show: Men on the DL

2007-07-09T08:25:00.000-04:00

The & Show: Special Guest Curtis Davis

2007-07-02T09:09:00.000-04:00

The Bitter Issue

2007-07-01T00:09:00.000-04:00

It’s the 7th month of the 7th year. I have been anticipating the arrival of JULY 2007 for about 4 years now. This year is a transformational year. So much is going on, The Gays are taking the world by storm and finally stepping up and making our voices heard louder than ever. For the July 2007 issue I decided to explore something a little darker. We all have that dark side to us but many of us (Thank God) don’t show it. I don’t believe that people should show their darker sides because it really isn’t needed in the world. Can you imagine a world where everyone was evil and bitter? The world would be a terrifying place.

I have had a lot on my mind this year and some of the things I just didn’t feel ready to express until now. This issue is just a walk on that dark side, it is by no means who I am as a person. For many who know me, know that I am a giving person, kind-hearted and genuinely thankful for what I have and where I am in my life. This BITTER issue unravels and expresses those thoughts that I’ve allowed to lay dormant in my mind. I couldn’t take it anymore so I decided to UNLEASH the BITTERNESS and share it with you.

This month check out FLAWLESS model Eddie Carrington in God Made Me FLAWLESS. The Shadow returns with Angry Gay Men. Spiritually Speaking is a new column by David Albert Farmer Ph.D. Be sure to get your monthly inspiration.

As always, thank you for supporting The 7 Magazine. Don't forget to pass this site along to a friend.

Who Is Nathan Seven Scott?

2007-07-01T00:08:00.001-04:00

I had been following the life of Nathan Scott ever since he had the now defunct Gotnathan.com. I’m a fag hag at best so there is no shame in my game. But I’ve always thought Nathan to be a very interesting character. I remember the first time I met Nathan, it was at a charity event that he was hosting at the Gay & Lesbian Center in New York City. There he was in all his royal splendor, bouncing around talking to everyone and running the show. The bake-sale styled event went over quite well as everyone was pleased and entertained.

Nathan is a man of many talents, he produced and co-wrote a one man show called Blacklight about 6 years ago, my how time flies. It was this show that put Nathan Scott on the Black Gay map in New York. Nathan was able to command his audience, making them laugh and cry. Now that’s talent!

Today Nathan Scott has become SEVEN, a man of many faces, talents and personalities. I recently begged Nathan for an interview after reading an article written about him in CLIK Magazine. I wondered why no one bothered to write or blog about him prior to now (check out his answer later in this interview).

We met in midtown. Nathan told me that he’s always wanted to be interviewed in a hotel lobby. Hey I’m easy so I went with it. Plus it’s different, and it’s Nathan Seven Scott! He arrived just shortly after 4pm wearing a pair of Gucci shades, a black shirt and a pair of jeans. Not too flashy just enough.

TW: Nathan, it’s great to finally get a chance to sit with you and talk shop.

NS: Tiffany, girl you know it’s long overdue.

TW: So where do we start?

NS: I don’t know this is your thing, for once I am the interviewee so ask away.

TW: Can I get personal?

NS: Sure, I would much rather focus on my professional life and not too much about my sexuality. People get enough of that, they know who I am, I don’t really hide anything about myself. I think. (He smiles with a slight roll of the eyes.)

TW: So, how’s Jared?

NS: Jared is fine. We aren’t going to talk about my relationship with Jared either Tiffany. I don’t think people really want to know more about that right now. If so they can pick up the last copy of CLIK, it’s all written in black and white.

TW: Are you being shady Nathan, or should I call you Seven?

NS: Nathan is fine. No it’s not shade, it’s the truth. I’m sure we will be asked about our relationship over and over again but I don’t want this interview to be about that.

TW: Okay. I got you. So let’s talk about your online magazine. It’s become very popular to what do you owe it’s success?

NS: Popular. I guess. You know, I can honestly say that I had no idea that I would reach over 5000 people every month but somehow the word has gotten out there about my magazine. People have told me that they enjoy it because of the graphics and my FLAWLESS boys.

TW: I love FLAWLESS, how did you come up with that concept?

NS: Hmm. I don’t remember. Actually, yes. I few years ago I wanted to do a calendar. I was working with my partner at the time Kevin Scott on HOMME 2004. I hired a photographer to shoot the models and I remember him not giving me exactly what I wanted with the output. He always wanted to inject his ideas and I felt since I was paying him, he should do what I asked. Not the case, so I remember purchasing my own camera the following year and asking a few friends to pose for me and FLAWLESS was born. I had been listening to the PATIENCE album by George Michael and song number 7 on the album is titled FLAWLESS so I went with that and it’s been a staple ever since.

TW: Wow, that’s impressive. All of your models have been very attractive. How do you find them?

NS: In the beginning, many of them were friends of mine and then people started coming to me to photograph them and since I do this because I enjoy it, I take on a new challenge with every month. I also enjoy doing the graphics to the photos, that’s the highlight for me. It makes me feel good knowing that I created that and people are enjoying the view.

TW: So, I know that you are a producer as well, what exactly do you produce?

NS: Well let’s see. I blame Nathan H. Williams for me becoming a producer. There I was minding my own business and he up and tells me about a script written by Maurice Jamal, called Dirty Laundry. I took some time and read over the script and told Nathan that I’d be willing to bet on him because I knew he would do his absolute best to make this movie a big success. So that’s when I became a producer. Since then I’ve taken that title and ran with it.

TW: You also produce parties in New York City correct?

NS: Yes, I currently produce the hottest Tuesday night party in the city, along with Nathan Williams and Yamil X. The party is called Got2b(2)@OCEAN. It’s an urban-latin hip-hop party. There is no other party quite like it. I also produce a monthly party with James Saunders, Fred Pierce, Lee Soulja, Ricky Day and Charles Jackson called MEN ARE FROM MARS. This party also has it’s own unique flavor. We have branded it to be the largest party for black gay men. Expect big things from this party.

TW: Okay. So, now let’s talk about The & Show. How did that come about?

NS: It’s so funny answering these questions because you know the answers to them. Anyway, (as he rares back in his chair laughing out loud, neighboring patrons glance over), so what did you ask me. Just kidding. The & Show, well it’s the online once a week show that I produce with my partner Jared Shuler. It came about because I was bored with what’s on TV and what’s available to black gay men. We don’t have an outlet where our voice is heard. We are forced to listen to everybody else talk about the problems they have in relationships or the problems they have finding dates or their fashion tips and the list goes on but where is OUR platform? We didn’t have one so I created one and it’s been working.

TW: I love the show. I watch it every Monday. So do you have plans on creating another show?

NS: I don’t have time to think about another show right now. I’m trying to get The & Show noticed by somebody, anybody!

TW: Do you think people are ready for you guys?

NS: I know people aren’t ready for us. You should see some of the emails we get. I swear people who tune in to our show take some of the things we say personally as if we are speaking directly to them. I wish people would watch the show for what it’s worth. We are just having a conversation between the two of us and in some cases talking to a special guest. But are people ready for anything?

TW: Can we talk about your love life for a minute?

NS: You are skating on thin ice. What do you want to know?

TW: Are you in love?

NS: Yes.

TW: Is that it?

NS: Yes. I told you I didn’t want to talk about it. I’m in love with what I do. I spend more time with my computer and my thoughts than I do with any man honestly. I don’t expect a man to bring me happiness. I have to find happiness on my own. I find happiness in my work. I don’t mind because at the end of the day that’s really all I’m going to end up with anyway. MY WORK. A man can leave at any time, we have no control over that. At least I have comfort in knowing that my work and my creative mind won’t desert me.

TW: Wow! Those are some really powerful statements. Do you think other men feel that way?

NS: It’s not just men. I think people in general are self-absorbed. It’s pretty unfair to expect someone else to enter your life. Learn you. Love you for all of your flaws and then try to figure out what makes you tick. That’s a lot of work and most people in this day and age don’t have that type of time to invest, that’s why so many relationships fail. People want instant happiness and that doesn’t exist.

TW: What would you do if you had a million dollars?

NS: Spend it.

TW: On what?

NS: Girl, I don’t know give me a million dollars and I will let you know. I hate when people ask that question and they aren’t sitting in front of me with a check book. I’ve been asked that question at least 10 times in my lifetime and all I can say is that I would spend it. I’m surely not going to just look at it. (Nathan gives me an evil smirk).

TW: Your big day is fastly approaching, Saturday, July 7^th, 2007. Are you excited?

NS: You know, I have obsessed about something magical happening on 07.07.07 and I had absolutely no idea it would be an engagement party. About a year ago I was having a conversation with my friend and Editor in Chief of UNeQ Magazine Raymonde Green and we were saying something big had to happen on that day. It’s amazing how the universe works, I don’t know what to expect but I’m sure the event will be FLAWLESS!

TW: Are you expecting a lot of people?

NS: Yes and No. The event will be semi-exclusive because the space is meant to be intimate, but I feel like once people find out about it, they will want to be there just to see what we have planned. The event is being hosted by someone who has fastly become one of my favorite people, Mr. R. Isaac. He’s an incredible man who believes in my vision and so I’m really blessed to know him.

TW: One last question for you Mr. Scott. Do you think that you are misunderstood?

NS: Oh gosh what prompted that question? I think most people feel that they are misunderstood. I mean just look at us all going through life wanting people to get who we are. I will admit to being a complex individual. I’m an only child. I tend to enjoy playing solo rather than socializing, contrary to popular belief. I am more reserved that most people think. My persona on the show is not who I am all the time in person. Sometimes I have to turn it off. I am a home body. I’m married to my computer I keep trying to tell you.

TW: I have so many more things to ask you but I’ll save them for the next interview.

NS: Thanks. There will always be something for me to talk about. Trust me!

FLAWLESS - July 2007 - Eddie Carrington

2007-07-01T00:07:00.000-04:00

1. Tell me about yourself. where are you from? tell me about your family? I'm from "Upstate" New York, Liberty, New York to be exact; it's about about two hours Northwest from Manhattan. I was born in Yonkers, however I grew up in a small predominantly Jewish community. I feel the opportunities that I had growing up were available because of my community, however I know I could never live in a small town, with such a lack of diversity, like that ever again. I was the youngest of three children. I say was, because my sister passed away from cancer about ten years ago. We were a very tight knit family so I really miss her and my mother's company immensely. My mother passed away a year and a half after my sister. When adversity strikes it is imperative to push through the pain and come out on top. My sister was the first person that ever told me I could do modeling. If it wasn't for her, I probably wouldn't have been confident enough to do everything I've accomplished in life.

2. You have an amazing body. Were you born with it or did it take years of building it up? No, ninety-nine percent of the population with great bodies typically do "something" to maintain their physique. In my case I was always in sports growing up. When I graduated high school I excelled in track and football, and I was on the basketball team. I'll keep it real with you, I sat on the bench on our basketball team, but at least I made the team. I started running track in college, discovered weight lifting, and began taking dance very seriously. I'm still dancing and teaching class, and a few years ago I was internationally ranked on a trio team in Sports Aerobics. We were first in Nation and fourth in the World. It was an amazing time in my life.

3. If you had to choose (3) fast food places to dine where would you dine and why? Wow, aren't I supposed to lead people to believe I never eat fast food. Well, contrary to popular belief, that's an assumption, I do eat fast food, however I try not to eat it very often. I love Quiznos. I think they have the best hero sandwiches. Wendy's is good too! I don't go there that often, however, when their food is "fresh" and hot, I admit I really enjoy my dining experience there. For my third choice, which I rarely ever eat I guess I would say Kentucky Fried Chicken. I love chicken, call me stereotypical!!

4. What suggestions do you have for someone who wants to lose weight and start developing a better and healthier body? Set small incremental goals. Definitely have a long-term goal in mind, however if you set small goals and strive hard to accomplish those small goals then it makes the process of losing weight a lot more rewarding!!! Also, stay consistent and don't give up. It's very easy to loose sight of your goals when you don't accomplish them right away.

5. How do you deal with your frustrations and the craziness of this fast paced world? How do you handle depression? I don't know if I would use the adjective depressed. I do get down on myself and occasionally I feel stagnant. Everything around me seems to be progressing and I may be feeling steadfast and immobile. Fortunately, those moments don't happen very often, however, when I do find myself confronting those situations, I allow myself a moment to explore how I'm feeling. I don't like to run away from my emotions. I use my optimism and generally great attitude to persevere and break out of that slump!!

6. We all have had embarrassing moments. Tell me about one of your embarrassing moments. I was on the Cross Country Track team in high school. One of our activities was to do a ten mile run. Now if you remember I'm from the country so there are lots of trees, grass, and open space. I found myself, half way into the run having to pass gas, fart. Well, I was alone and there isn't anything around so who cares, well what I thought was a fart wasn't. I shit all over myself and still had about five miles to go to get back to the school. I got rid of the underwear, however, some of it had stained my shorts as well and I had to go back to the school, finish our workout, and get home. Running back to the school was absolutely an embarrassing and humiliating experience. Even though I don't think anyone realized what happened because I did a good job of keeping it a secret I felt like everyone knew what had happened. I can't believe I just told you that story.

7. Describe a romantic evening that you might plan for someone. I love to give surprises. So, when it comes to being romantic I love the element of surprise. I would purchase a trip to somewhere overseas, maybe Madrid and book a very expensive hotel, like The Sol, one of the leading Hotels of the World. One night order room service, have wine, fruit, cheese, etc. and hang out in the hotel all night and half of the morning making love and enjoying one another's company. I also like learning about other cultures so sight seeing, hitting the musuems, and the night life is a must. I love discovering a new place with someone I consider very special. Now, I know I gave more than just one night but I think creating memories that are long lasting is so important. Unfortunately, my idea may not be sordid but it's defintely romantic; it's also something I've done!!

The SHADOW: On Angry Gay Men

2007-07-01T00:06:00.000-04:00

i'm mad as hell, and i'm not gonna take it anymore…

i've come across quite a few people recently who have expressed their opinion to me that being gay makes them angry. really angry… some even feel that being gay is a curse.

i have to admit that for a long time, i was also of this same opinion. i mean, i feel that there comes a time in all of our lives when we realize just how difficult being gay really is - especially when we live in a society that, for the most part, values masculinity, the "laws" of marriage, and other stereotypes of the typical straight man and his or her relationship.

growing up, i remember having a very difficult time coping with the fact that i was gay. i was one of those individuals who never quite fit in. i was always a little bit different than the other students in school. not necessarily "obviously gay" different, but different nonetheless. i never much cared for the various sports teams gallivanting around campus; never became versed in the jargon of others in my generation, so to speak; and never took the time to get to know any of the females in said generation either. i had my own events, spoke my own language, and my few friends were company enough. i was fine.

and then one day, not particularly different from any other, i received that familiar look of disdain from a group of students passing my way in the hall. on a quick impulse i asked my best friend to go and find out why i, in their eyes, was so unworthy of any sort of civil communication [read: i asked her to find out why they hated me so much and treated me like shit]; cuz i couldn't get it. she returned with 5 simple, yet powerful words… "because they think you're gay."

that moment became incredibly significant in how i was to live the next 3 years of my life. those 5 words, i'm sure, rolled quite easily off the tongue of whoever said them, but they landed pretty damn hard in my head. as far as i was concerned, i was going to be hated and ostracized for the rest of my life due to the simple assumption that i was gay. no evidence, no confession, just an assumption. i knew for myself that i liked other guys, and had a general idea of what that meant for the world around me, but right then – it hit home. i was gay, everyone knew it, and i was to spend the rest of my life alone. that made me angry!

when i first entered college, i almost couldn't stand to be around gay people. the way they were so open with their sexuality—just flaunting it around as if it were normal. as if it didn't matter. it took me forever and a day to realize that it is normal—it doesn't matter. and my life has consistently gotten easier ever since. i grew to know and to accept that there may be certain things that i'd have to attain through other means… but i can attain them nonetheless. i can have a family with 2.5 kids, a dog and a cat. i can live in a house in the most distinguished of areas. i can be just as happy as any straight couple there ever existed- maybe even happier.

as far as i 'm concerned, gay guys and gals get to live lives that are way more fabulous than those of our straight counterparts. think of it. gay men and women everywhere are becoming trendsetters in just about everything you can possibly think of. the gay dollar is now worth more than that of some rather large cultures that inhabit this country. we have proven to the country, and in some ways, the world, that we are just as good, if not better than those who prefer people of the opposite sex. and that's all i need to know as far as inspiration is concerned. i no longer feel angry about the idea that as a gay man, i can't live up to anything. as a matter of fact… anything you can do, i can do better.

now, i fully understand that what worked for me will not work for many others. what made me angry about being a gay man could very well be something completely different than what made or makes you angry. the important thing is that you realize that your life was not given to you so that you can spend it angry and upset about something you absolutely had and continue to have no control over. find that thing that gives you inspiration and triumph over your anger at being gay and run with it. run as fast as you can. only then, can you give up what doesn't matter, and focus on what really does… your life!

Do Gays Have an American Dream?

2007-07-01T00:05:00.001-04:00

I was speaking with a good friend the other day about having children someday. He told me that he wanted to have kids but his lover of 5 years wasn't interested. I thought to myself, will he not be able to fulfill on his "Gay American Dream"?

Are gay men often times deprived of living the American Dream just because of our sexuality? One challenge that the black gay community has is the ability to start and maintain relationships. I've often questioned why is it that there are so few black couples. I'm speaking from my experience in New York City. I don't know what the general consensus is in other cities but in New York, long term relationships are hard to come by. One of the reasons I've discovered is a lack of communication. Black men don't know how to talk to one another. And it doesn't start with romantic relationships, it starts with basic friendships. In this community, I've found that we do not know how to talk to one another in a positive way. At any given moment, you can step into a situation where gay men congregate and find one reading or putting down another. And the question is why? Why is it that we feel the need to make ourselves look better while putting someone else down?

SHADE is such learned behavior in our community. We learn it when we first hit the pavement down the gay road. Depending on how and where you come out, often times we are introduced to SHADE very early in our gay lives. We are subjected to gay men who first of all don't love and respect themselves so, they pass on the hurts and heartaches they've lived through to the next generation of gay men. Have you ever stopped and thought about the real reason behind why we judge each other and put each other down? Do you ever question why the need to identify another man as SHE, GIRL or BITCH? Why is it that when we see another man sashay we are automatically disgusted saying things like: "oh child she's a lady", or "i thought she was trade, she's actually a twister." At what point did what's clearly A MAN, become a SHE? Saying that we are anything less than a man is such a put down, I don't care how you spin it. We are all MEN and should be treated as such. What happens is, the minute we identify each other as anything other than MEN we treat each other with disrespect. Think about the last time you saw someone you found attractive and discovered that he was effeminate. You instantly had no interest in getting to know another human being because you were no longer attracted to or interested in having sex with him. That is our problem. We write each other off way too soon!. We say that we are a part of a community, but we don't commune.

I've spoken to a few white couples. I've listened to the stories they tell of how they met. I've listened to them talk about their travels and the homes they've purchased together. I've listened to some talk about adopting a child. Now don't get me wrong, I am in no way saying that white gay men are any better than we are but their conversations are much different. When was the last time you dated someone long enough to the point where you opened a joint checking account? It's very likely that it won't happen, why? Because we don't trust each other that much. When was the last time you had a conversation with your boyfriend about investing in property? The conversation missing in our community is BUILDING. we live in a day and age where we should know how to combine our income and resources to create better lives for ourselves.

I was recently having a conversation with my mother and I told her something that really saddened her to hear. It's a conversation that many may have entertained but have not said it out loud. I told my mother that I'd much rather play hard and die young than to grow old. I mean think about it for a minute. Take my situation for example. I am an only child with a small family from which is somewhat estranged. By the time I'm 65 years old, there is a great chance that my mother will no longer be with me or in a nursing home somewhere. I have no children or grandchildren. If I am not with a significant other at that time then I will most likely be alone. It's likely I will end up in a gay nursing home around a bunch of queens that I don't much care for (see there, subconsciously I went there). Is that what I have to look forward to? Will I have to live in a community where some new virus is running rampant and everyone is popping viagra still trying to get a nut? I pray to God that isn't what my future looks like but the reality is, that's how it appears right now.

So the question I propose to you is... WHAT IS THE GAY AMERICAN DREAM? How do you see your future as a black gay man? Is it bright or is it bleak?

PARTY: MARTIAN Independence - JULY 3rd

2007-07-01T00:04:00.001-04:00

THE HOTTEST BLACK CIRCUIT PARTY DECLARES IT'S INDEPENDENCE!!!

Spiritually Speaking ... Why Gay Men Lie

2007-07-01T00:03:00.000-04:00

I don't know of any research that proves the notion that gay men lie any more than anyone else so let's consider briefly the reasons anyone might speak untruths. This requires some introspection.

1) People who lie to others tend to lie to themselves. If I am not honest with myself about one or more aspects of my life, you can rest assured that I'm not going to be honest with other people about that area or those areas.

2) Those who lie to others may lie about something in their lives about which they are embarrassed or uncomfortable. Someone who feels that he weighs either too little or too much will rarely tell another person his true weight. (Of course, the fact that online introductions and conversation has made dating more like picking out fresh produce than dealing with human beings has us marketing or promoting ourselves to potential "buyers" by revealing facts about ourselves that are really not the business of strangers.) An individual may have allowed himself to believe that he is not worth love because he was neglected or abused by one or both parents; he may attempt to compensate by telling others what wonderful parents he had/has knowing full well that this is false but being unable to revisit the pain of rejection by telling the truth.

3) There are those who lie because they find themselves in positions of sensing the need to share too much too soon. Intimacy (or pseudo-intimacy) can happen almost instantaneously in the modern world. As a prelude to a sexual encounter with a near-stranger, there can be the rapid-fire exchange of names, contact information, sexual preferences, and health reports. People who wouldn't, for a minute, lie in normal circumstances find themselves pressed to reveal personal information to someone they are not ever sure they will even see again so in a rush, in a pinch, they lie.

4) Some people lie because it's a game to them; it's fun for them to see how much nonsense another person will fall for before finally catching on to how high the piles of poop have actually gotten.

5) Some among us lie, sad to say, because they intend to hurt us. There is no other explanation for it. They speak a falsehood to us knowing that in believing them, we will be hurt in some way. Or, they withhold a vital piece of information that may even endanger someone's life; that, too, is lying.

LGBT persons have a hard enough go of it in most cultures that we want to think they could at least be there for each other, and yet we all know that is too often not the case in any case. Gay men can be much more destructive to each other than the worst of homophobes. That is truly tragic.

Jesus from Nazareth is said to have commented: "The truth will make you free." We would all do well to remember his wisdom in assessing the damage lies do to those who hear them and to those who tell them.
A professor and a pastor, Dr. Farmer has served three gay-affirming congregations over more than two decades. He may be contacted through his website: web.mac.com/dfarmer777.