What the F&CK?
so i went on a date 2 nights ago. i had a great time. he looked as dapper as he did when he asked me out. i had on something cute. we were both on time. the restaurant was intimate, the perfect setting for a first date. the wine and conversation flowed. it was almost too good to be true.
after the date we took a walk. we talked about the future. we talked more about relationships. he revealed to me that he'd been checking me out for a few months and just never felt comfortable approaching me because he was intimidated by my popularity. POPULARITY? am i really that popular? c'mon! that was such a cop out. i can't believe that someone would think that i was anywhere near unapproachable. i'm one of the easiest going people i know. i try to be drama free so what the hell?
anyway, we parted ways that evening and promised to call each other when we reached our respective homes. we talked on the phone for about an hour and ended our call around 2AM. he promised he would call me on Thursday. when i hadn't heard from him by mid-afternoon i called and left him a message. i wanted to know when we could connect again because i had such a great time and he said he did as well.
i hadn't heard from him, however, i woke up this morning with the above written in a text message. WHAT THE F&CK? how am i supposed to respond to that? i feel somewhat disrespected. are the brothas talking to each other like that these days? is that all he sees me as? was that his motive all along? well i dunno. i haven't responded yet and i'm not sure i will. but, how am i to react when i see him out. i mean he does frequent my parties. this is awkward. what would you do if you got a text message like that on your blackberry, cell phone, sidekick, tre-o or whatever device you have?
Post your comment. i want to know what i should do next. oh yeah, did i mention that the boy is really attractive, has a great body and from the way he dances it seems that the sex would be off the hook. but i'm saying!!!! can we at least have 3 dates first... dang!
posted by C.R. Knight on Friday, October 20, 2006
8 Comments:
When People show you who you are ..believe them.As great as the date was an as idealistic the situation sounds or you might want it to be, he has shown you where his mindset is. So honestly if you are looking for romance and to be courted traditionally from someone who writes whatever he feels(non-traditionally) then my good man, let him be honest so now you can be honest and say no. Don't make him to be something he isn't trying to be, cause honestly,,(and he used the word honestly" his objective will be the same..he will have completed and then you're really saying ..What the F&ck.
Don't blame him or men for saying what they say. Men only use successful tactics and lets face it, this would not be the first time he texted someone with this response and they answered him eagerly with no resistance.
When Men stop answering these requests and texts, then courtship in its truest entity will then take true form. If you can find a guy who in all the sea of sexual advances knows the true meaning of courting..then hold on to him..Nice guys might finish last but they never finish alone
Well you can thank him for his candor. I really don't know how "honest" it is, b/c going out on a date like that, talking about the future, and relationships is alluding to wanting something more.
So I think you should respond with the same candor and be like "nah I'm good" or "You ain't say nuthin' but a word when?". You realize either way its going to be awkward afterwards. But on the other hand, he could stop coming to your parties after its all said and done, b/c he may have been going to just to sneak a peek at you.
Once he knows that you're off limits or he's had you its off to the next conquest.
Yes this is how alot of negroes carry "dating" nowadays, get used to it, and keep it moving.
YOU TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT YOU:
Don't respond because YOU don't respond to statements like that. It has to be a non-negotiable, so that he doesn't get any kind of message that subliminally says "YOU LET ME GET AWAY WITH THIS." It's so rough, because very much like boys on the playground used to push girls (or boys) that they liked, today it appears that SUP, YOU F&(*ING, WHAT'S GOOD have all replaced HOW ARE YOU? I'D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU and sometimes brothers spew it out of habit.
WE MUST BREAK THIS HABIT!
How? By standing on the truth and forcing COURTSHIP back in our dating. OKAY, for those of you who are just doing the do, that's on you. BUT for the brothers who are OUT THERE, ON THE PROWL, ONLINE (like myself) saying I WANT SOMETHING MORE, then DO MORE, SAY MORE, BE MORE, EXPECT MORE, ACCEPT MORE and we will have something to work with besides THE GAY GAMES of how many dates before you get to the center of a...YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!
GREAT POST!
OH...AND I WOULD HONESTLY AND SINCERELY LIKE TO ADD this TO THE POT:
WHAT IF HE WASN'T TALKING TO YOU? In this day and age of texts and emails and miscommunication, MAYBE HE WAS NOT TALKING TO YOU. It doesn't seem as though THAT RESPONSE sounds like it fits anything you said or did. WHAT THE F is not something that sounds like LET'S DO IT, I WANNA DO IT...It sounds like someone was AFFRONTED and you didn't do that in your words. So maybe, SHAGGY, it wasn't you...:)
JUST A THOUGHT!
Whoa! That was definitely a frank text. I would respond with the same frankness
i welcome the refreshing honesty of his comments... at least he isnt stringing you along thinking it is going to be more than what it was... he spent a nice evening with you and wants to have sex, i think if u want it too you should go for it but if a sex hookup isn't what you are looking for keep it moving.
You know what I think. I think that Gay black men are ridiculous first and far most because all they want is a great looking guy with the perfect abs, and the nice round ass. I think that you should tell him to fuck off and move onto someone else. People, ultimatley want to screw right after you have a great conversation with them. I think that he is not worth it try to go about living your life not consummed with this jerk off. i believe that you can easily find true romance when you least expect it. Most people today want that right away but you have to be patient and your true knight in shining armor will arrive at your door step.
Although his honesty is refreshing . The bottom line is this...do you want to go there with him or not? And before you answer that question, you must also ask yourself if you will be able to deal with the consequences afterwards, because he may not want anything to do with you after it's all said and done. If you know who you are and what it is you truly want out of life for yourself, then you already knew what to do when he sent you the text message. There is nothing wrong with just fucking if that's what you and that other person are okay with , but don't expect platinum when you settled for bronze
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